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Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’

Giving Back

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , , , on April 4, 2010| 1 Comment »

Pets don’t have many choices, they are completely at our mercy, I know it doesn’t always feel that way but they are, and we are responsible for them, every last one.  They are bred, for the most part, with little or no thought for the thousands of other dogs and cats who don’t have homes, don’t have anyone to look after them.  Most people don’t understand that when a dog is purchased from anywhere but a reputable breeder or some sort of humane society we are supporting puppy mills, supporting back yard breeders who out of ignorance are producing dogs that are probably going to end up with temperament or medical problems if not both, breeding dogs that are statistically going to end up on the loose living a miserable existence, or living in a shelter.  Either way it’s no way to live but at least at the shelter they have just that, shelter, food, people who care about them and with any luck, eventually a good home. 

Animals in our society don’t rate for much in any legal sense, they are simply property and not just property but the lowest sort of property.   In an emergency (such as a fire) the rule of thumb according to Emergency services is you save people, property and then animals (the last is usually optional).

Our pets give us so much otherwise why would there be so many of them?  No matter what we do to them they love us unconditionally, they help us in so many ways. How many times on the news do we hear about the pets that alert their owners to a fire and end up saving the family?  They are our constant companions, they are our eyes, there are alert dogs, rescue dogs, dogs that help us find criminals, find mines for soldiers and the list goes on.  

clicking on this link will enable you to donate to the Clearfield County SPCA where every bit helps.  Plus if Sequoia is one of the top donation earners she will be featured on their 2011 calendar.  Raising money is not really what my blog is about and I promise this won’t be a regular theme, but every once in a while you have to give back.  So thanks in advance, thanks to those that have already given. 

As always thanks for reading, and next post we will be back to our regularly scheduled programing.

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Decorating, Day Two

Posted in humour, Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , on March 30, 2010| 9 Comments »

 We are still working on the bedroom remodel, (yes it is going to be a long drawn out process). We  removed some more molding pulled out the TV and TV cabinet, and no it’s not one of those sleek little flat screens,  oh no my friends it is one of those really heavy monster TV’s that is the exact opposite of flat so it has the bonus of being bulky as well as heavy. 

We removed the baseboards and cut a whole in the back of the cabinet to accommodate the socket in the wall and put up the wall paper like stuff to cover the paneling.  Now the wall looks great the TV cabinet sits further back into the corner and flush against the wall so it takes up a little less room and looks fantastic.

Still my wife and I worked as a team with no issues between us. Wait, there was one small issue.  The wallpaper is pre-glued but the glue has to be activated, so you cut a length you want, (in our case 7 ft long and the paper is 18 inches in width) and then run the paper through a trough of water, each part must be in the water for a good 15 seconds.  There are probably a variety of ways to execute this particular task but we have decided the, ‘Aching arms, sore back stretched out ham strings’ method works best for us. 

Allow me to explain, the trough is 18.5 inches long 3 inches in width and 4 inches deep.  So you can only wet 3 inches of wall paper at a time.  We have a bath sized walk in shower so the trough goes on the floor in the shower, my wife gets on one side and holds (at this point the bulk of the wallpaper) I’m on the other side of the trough bent in half placing the leading edge into the trough and we count 1 one thousand, thousand, 2 one thousand, thousand all the way up to 15 one thousand, thousand.  We found if you rush this step your stick ability to the wall is less than great.  Then I pull up the leading edge 3 inches and my wife hunches down in half and holds the next three inches in the trough and begins the count, then I raise the leading edge another three inches and so on for 7 foot length.  It is a slow process and halfway through my arms are getting tired because holding up wet wallpaper is not as easy as it may sound and 15 seconds multiplied by 7 feet is longer then you might expect. It is hard to ignore the pain in the back and thighs that creeps in as you remain in a bent position for an extended length of time.  

So, we are in position and everything is running smooth, we have about 5 feet of the paper good and wet and then it happens, my lovely wife who is still crouched over manages to head-butt the end of the paper I am holding up.  Did I mention that because you don’t want to ‘loose’ the glue you go through the process with the glue side face up in the water, which means that the non glue side is facing me and the glue side is, well you guessed it, facing my wife who now has glue hair.  Okay it may be that my arms were getting tired and I may have allowed a little slack in the paper and it could be the paper met the top of my wife’s head as she was leaning forward just a little. 

The best part is we were able to laugh.

We were able to laugh even though the future of my job is questionable.  We were able to laugh even though this is my wife’s busy season at work and they are understaffed and under a lot of strain.  We were able to laugh even though our room is in total upheaval. We were able to laugh even though this remodel is going to be a long drawn out process. We were able to laugh even though we have a few pets having some medical issues.

We are able to laugh, and there is nobody who I’d rather be laughing with.

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Too Fast

Posted in humour, Lifes Observations, tagged , , , on March 23, 2010| 5 Comments »

I was in Barnes and Noble where they are heavily advertising ‘The Nook” which if you don’t know is an electronic book. 

I was passing the information desk when I happened to hear the following conversation between Grandmother and Grandaughter (10 or 11 yrs old)

Grandaughter: “What is a nook?”

Grandmother: “Its a quiet little place where you can go to read”

I love technology and we will be getting a Nook but I really identified with Grandma.

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So Exciting

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , on March 3, 2010| 5 Comments »

Many moons ago my parents, (who own Perfect Magic) used to host a magic convention in Montreal each year.  It was a big deal some of the biggest names in the industry would attend.  I won’t list them here as most of you are not magicians so it wouldn’t really mean anything to you, and those that are magicians can click here  to get the full list.  After the convention we would have a party with the invited guests (magic dealers, lectures, performers and friends who helped us out) and have a grand ole’ time.

At one such ‘after’ party a friend of my mothers, said to my Mother, “I envy you, you know all these entertainers and its such a different sort of life it must be so exciting!”  My mother laughed and replied, “What are you talking about?  We go to work, we figure out what we are going to eat for dinner, we watch tv and we go to sleep then wake up the next morning and do it again. It is you who lives the exciting life, you’re a teacher, you travel you’ve seen the world, now that’s exciting!” My mothers friend laughed and said, “Not really, we go to work, we figure out whats for dinner…”

Last night my wife and I were eating dinner at Denny’s with what has now become the Tuesday night crew.  After reading my blog one of our new found friends commented that we live such an exciting life compared to theirs.  I said, “not really,  we wake up, go to work, figure out what we are going to do for dinner…”

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Small Towns

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , on February 3, 2010| 5 Comments »

The following are just a few examples of how small, small towns really are.

The person who they just hired for a customer service position where I work, used to work with my neighbour.

 A sales person where I work now, used to work at the same branch of the same bank in the same position I worked for, only five years earlier.

My neighbour’s beloved baby sitter had to quit because she got a full-time job.  The full-time job was in the lab where my wife works, (we figured out they were the same person years later)

The maintenance person for the building where my wife works is married to the cleaning person at my work.

My ex-dentists, ex-husband is a sales rep where I work.

My wife’s co-workers husband worked with the person who owned the house my new neighbours now own.

My neighbours grandfather built the house I live in. The granddaughters husband installed our central air and heat for us. Later, the company we hired to fix the original install knew the husband in question.

The entire town I live in, and the town next door to the town I live in know exactly where I live if I mention that I live in the ‘old Donaldson place’

The entire wait staff at Denny’s not only knows us by name but our drinks are practically waiting for us before we sit down.

When I go to the local market, and by market I mean gas station with a little store attached people tell me, ‘so you are the ones with the husky who are living in the old Donaldson place”

You don’t have to know my name, just mention the Canadian eh and they all know who you are talking about.

When you go to any sort of ‘meeting’ and everyone is made to stand up and introduce themselves 8 out of 10 people work at the same place.

Never mind small towns, how about a close knit family, go ahead give a listen.

I\’m my own grandpa

Stay tuned, I’m sure I’ll add a few more and I’m sure you will have some of your own to add.

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Trouble

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , on January 27, 2010| Leave a Comment »

Standing in the parking lot at the grocery store in Phillipsburg my wife announced that she was ready for a kitten (see Fate Or Circumstance, Part 1) and I rebutted that I wanted a dog. Who knew it was a magical parking lot? 

August of Nine years ago we were still trying to find a home for Husky when the Trouble began!

We were just about to take our exit off the highway when my wife yelled, KITTEN! I pointed the car to the shoulder of the road, hit the brakes then checked the rearview mirror. “Where is the kitten?” I asked as we got out of the car.

“Over in the bushes on the other side of the road”

 “sigh”

Just as home is always up hill, everything else seems to be on the other side of the highway.  Sure enough I looked at where she was pointing and there the kitten sat meowing bloody murder.  Our experience has been that when you approach cats on the side of the road they tend to turn and run, so the plan was simple, I would head around on the diagonal and try to loop around behind while my wife took the direct approach.  I went my way, my wife waited a beat and went her way.  The kitten had plans of its own and made a direct charge across the road into my wife’s arms and promptly bit her on the wrist.  If cats could talk this one would have been telling us. ‘What the hell took you so freakin’ long!’ We made sure none of his litter mates were hanging around and then headed home.

From day one the cat was trouble and was so named.  He didn’t get along well with others,  he was strong, he was ornery and he was not afraid to use his teeth and claws.  This one we were definitely adopting out.  When adopting out an animal our first priority of course is to find a good home.  There is no use placing an animal in an environment that isn’t better than the previous situation.  We were starting to realize Trouble was going to be a difficult case.  There is no doubt that he would take one bite out of somebody and he would find himself back on the wrong side of the door.  It made sense that this was how he first wound up on the side of the road.  We took him to our trusty vet Lee and there were no parasites, no worms, not a tick or flea to be found.  Somebody probably decided that he was just too much to handle and had recently dumped him.

Trouble was a pain in the ass, because of that he spent most of his nights locked in the bathroom, otherwise around two in the morning we would all pay the price.  The other ‘problem’ was he could charm the pants off the devil.  Didn’t matter how scared our arms and hands were from his scratching or how sleep deprived we were from his night time antics,  it didn’t matter how he would torment the other cats all he had to do was turn on his charm and your heart melted. 

At four months old Trouble weighed in at five pounds and to the relief of all our vet agreed to have him neutered.  Nine years later Trouble weighs in at 18 pounds of solid muscle.

I admit we didn’t look too hard to find Trouble a home.  First because of his disposition most sane people would have booted him out the door.  Second, Trouble just has that certain charm. While he has calmed down some he can still raise a little hell.  Not long ago we added Gumdrop (our latest cat) into the mix and for months Trouble would simply not let Gumdrop on the floor!

Obviously it all worked out and some might accuse me of anthropomorphism but I think Trouble appreciates the fact that we love him for who he is and on his terms.  Every night after my wife and I settle into bed Trouble runs up between us for his nightly hug and then heads to the foot of the bed where he sleeps curled up behind my knees.

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The First Time

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , , on January 6, 2010| 7 Comments »

In post Number Ten I said that the end can usually be found in the beginning.  No matter how much we learn, how much we do, how many changes we endure I am becoming more and more convinced that the above statement is true.  Of course I can’t know that for sure as I’m not yet at the end, possibly the middle because now and again I get a hankering for a shiny red car, but thats another story.  

 I was talking to my oldest friend the other day and it sparked the memory of  his cat Skippy.  I am happy to report that Skippy lived a very long and luxurious life.  

The year was early high school and on most days I could be found hanging out at Richard’s house.

As Rich and I were leaving school I looked down into some bushes and there sitting ever so quietly was the cutest little grey kitten. Never before had I seen something so adorable and so pathetic.  It was all grey except for a white patch on his chest and huge polydactyl paws, that is, he had an extra toe on each front foot, a massive head and a tiny body.   I picked him up and looked at Rich, we knew there was no way I could take him home, but Rich had that look in his eye, he already had a plan.  We carried the cat 3 miles to Richard’s house and Skippy to his credit only panicked once while we crossed a busy street.

Once we got home I realized the brilliant plan Richard devised was to carry the cat home and figure out the rest when we got there. Skippy gobbled down the milk and Kraft singles we gave him and then explored the house. We knew Richard’s mother was due home soon so we put the cat outside and put more cheese on the porch so he would know which house to hang around of course Skippy gobbled down the cheese (so no evidence was left) as we headed to our usual spot in the basement. Richard only knew he couldn’t let his mother know that we brought the cat home.  The plan quickly became the ‘cat? what cat?’ plan.

We heard the front door open.

“Boys, there is a little grey kitten at the front door do you know anything about it?” we both went running upstairs to see the kitten that we ‘had never seen before’ . “Mom can we keep it?” was Richard’s plea, and of course the answer was no but we were not allowed to just abandon it we had to find the owner, our task was first to knock on all the doors in the neighbourhood and to call the local paper and put an ad in the lost pets section. We did as we were told, picking up the cat and knocking on doors knowing that there was no way anybody in the area owned this kitten after all it was found 3 miles away.  But Richard’s mother was watching us from the porch so there was no getting around it. Nobody of course had ever seen the cat before.

We were allowed to bring the cat in but had to keep it in the garage. We called the paper and placed the ad just as Richards dad came home. I always had trouble understanding him because of his heavy german accent but he was able to make himself  very clear this time,  the cat was to stay in the garage and under no circumstances was that cat allowed any further into the house.

The following day was Saturday, as usual Rich and I got together at his house, imagine my surprise to find the cat in the basement not the garage. Richard’s father relented and allowed the cat into the basement, but in no way was that cat allowed upstairs. 

By Monday morning Skippy had a name,  Mr. that cat is not leaving the garage had named the cat but it was some german name that nobody could pronounce luckily we were able to change the name to Skippy (because Rich saw him chasing a squirrel but the kitten was not running, he was skipping)  Mr. That cat is not leaving the garage not only named the cat but was now allowing the cat to sleep on the bed and rule the house and pretty much claimed the cat as his own.  Richard’s mother had gone to the butcher to buy chicken livers for Skippy which from that day forwards always topped off his cat food.  It quickly became the norm for Skippy to peruse the people food and only after determining that it was not better than his food could we all eat in peace.

All those years ago I never even thought about animal rescue, I was much to busy just trying to survive high school. It is only a good twenty-five years and many rescue’s later that I realized Skippy was my first rescue.  And now animal rescue which I only got involved in 10 years ago has partially defined who I am today.

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Scratching My Head In Wonder

Posted in Small town life, tagged , , , , , , , , , on January 2, 2010| 1 Comment »

Just because this is a small town and the locals are all connected if not related  It really is a small world  doesn’t mean that it’s a tight-knit community.  Five years back we were having a campfire with some neighbours one of which works at the university.  I was working at the bank at the time and we started telling tales.  Turns out my neighbour worked in the same office as Joe the bursar who makes daily deposits at the bank.  Next day Joe walks into the bank and I mention that one of the people he shares an office with is my neighbour X.

Joe: “Oh” he says to me, “so you must live over on hill street” (location and names are changed to protect the guilty). 

Me:  “Yes, right next to x, in fact her father in law used to own both properties” 

Joe: “Really, you must be in the old Smith house, I grew up around there”

Me: “Yes”  my wife has always told me if you want to let a local know just where we live all you have to do is let them know that we are in the “Old Smith Place” so I was amused by the response.

Joe: “Oh so you are next to the Hatfields” 

 At this point my dear readers you have to know I am not always quickest horse on the track as Joe’s last name happens to be Hatfield.

Me: “oh yeah the entire clan lives on my street” and I started humming the theme song from deliverance ‘dueling banjo’s’  the middle part of the song

Joe: “You live near Jane?”

Me: “Yes Jane shares a property line with us, do you know her?” I innocently ask.

Joe “She is my grandmother”

Now I am seriously regretting my rendition of dueling banjo’s and I’m trying to find a way to dig my way out of the hole I’ve now found myself in, and this is not a little hole.  Joe is the bursar of the university, the largest business around, the reason the whole town exists, a town that for some reason has a bank on every corner and I just called his grandmother and most of his family redneck hillbillies. You would think at this point I’d know when to keep my mouth shut, but I haven’t  So I add, “I’m sorry to hear about your grandfather I didn’t know him well but he was always nice to us.”  His response? “what happened with my grandfather?”

“Uhm Joe, he died a year ago from lung cancer” 

“Really?” he says to me, “I don’t talk keep up with that side of the family if you haven’t noticed they are a little strange up there, see you tomorrow” and out the door he went leaving me scratching my head in wonder.

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Be Prepared

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , , , , , on December 29, 2009| 1 Comment »

Do you prepare? When I am cooking I need to be prepared.  I have to figure out what I am going to make, find the recipe make sure I have all the ingredients and then I follow the recipe to the letter.  I bought a cook book and only after I got it home did I realize it was published in Britain and most of the recipes called for things like a dash of salt and a knob of butter and a smidge of things.  My measuring tools do not measure in quantities of knobs and smidgens.  The book looks impressive sitting on the counter but it will never be used by me.  My wife on the other hand walks into the kitchen with an idea and magically knows what ingredients will go with others to make something good.  She will walk through the grocery store and pick up some new item and says, “This looks interesting I’m sure I can use this with something” and in the cart it goes.  In this case it was orange curd.  Two weeks later she was making a cheese cake and decided to throw in the orange curd.  It was one of the best cheese cakes I ever had. 

When we travel the rolls are reversed I want to hit the road and go.  My wife likes to plan, when we went to California she took out a map decided where we were going to stay and called and made reservations.  (we made the trip in 3 days) Admittedly if she had not done that there was a night in Moab where we would have been sleeping in the car.  When we were dating and I was living in Vancouver I would buy a plane ticket two weeks ahead of time.  My wife would be bugging me for weeks, she wants to get the tickets a month in advance.

while I follow a recipe for cooking, I had no plans for the dog house I hadn’t figured out what materials I would need I just started hammering stuff together and it all worked out.  My best friend and I built a deck on the side of his parents house, no plans just an idea a saw and wood.  Last time I was in Montreal (20 years later) that deck was still there.

When my wife and I play video games she reads the directions watches all the clips and follows the plot, I just jump in start killin’ stuff and hope for the best.  When putting items together such as dog kennels, entertainment centers and the like we both believe the instructions are just manufactures suggestions.  I find it odd how we respond to different situations in such different ways 

We were out to dinner last night with some friends and in the course of a story he told us at one time he was a scout leader immediately I went back over 25 years and recalled a story I hadn’t thought of in at least 15 years. 

While visiting a friend in Ontario, we decided to go camping on Big Bear Lake.  We packed up a bunch of stuff took the little boat out and found a chain of islands used by the boy scouts for camping purposes . We found one complete with an outhouse, (for those who suffer from Crohn’s disease bathrooms are always on the forefront of every thought).  Even though it was an island there are still bears and other scavengers so we put up the tent put all our food in a bag and hoisted it into a tree.  Mike decided to use the outhouse.  He was in there for a bit when I heard him calling. He needed the toilet paper.  I tore our luggage apart but I finally had to tell him that we didn’t have any.  “Check the bag with the food”  I unhooked the rope, lowered the bag knowing it was all in vain, sure enough no toilet paper.  There was a long pause after I informed him of the bad news but he finally responded, “Can you bring me my checkbook?”  Brilliant I thought, he we are on a tiny island in the middle of a huge lake and we forgot toilet paper but managed to bring a checkbook.   “Nice going Mike, you forget toilet paper but bring along your checkbook.  I really don’t think you are going to be able to buy any toilet paper out here.”  Mike, while an odd sort of fellow was very resourceful as he replied “I’m not going to write a check with it, I am however going to clean up my deposit”  Really didn’t need to know that but I did have to give him credit.  Good thing debit cards had not been invented yet or he would have never brought a check book. 

Unknown to us, sometime after we made camp a troop of boy scouts made camp on a nearby island and must have been paying attention. The next day we took the little boat to a nearby ‘town’ purchased some toilet paper and headed back to camp.  Imagine our surprise when we found 6 rolls of toilet paper stacked up in front of our tent complete with a note.  Always be prepared,  Boy Scouts of Canada.

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Working It Out

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , , , , on December 27, 2009| 2 Comments »

I’ve been thinking a lot about relationships and what makes them work.  I’ve been told you should go on a canoe trip with your significant other and that should tell the tale.  I believe it, my ex-wife and I couldn’t even drive the car into uncharted territory without getting into some sort of argument.  My current wife and I have no trouble driving to new places and the canoe trip was a walk in the park.  It took us 2 days and lots of swearing to put together a dog kennel which the instructions said should take two adults two hours to put together.  We never swore at each other, well perhaps once or twice under our breath seriously though it was the total lack of instruction that was frustrating.  The point is that we were able to accomplish it together.  I guarantee that if we had to do it separately it would have never gotten done.  We also know when to back off and let the other do their own thing.  For example I built the dog house from scratch.  A few ideas I ran by my wife just to get a different perspective but in the end I pretty much did it myself.  I’m quite proud of it,  it has its own front deck, louverd windows, ceder shingles two rooms, fully insulated.  But thats enough bragging.  My wife knows how to decorate the house.  She has a great sense of what goes with what, Me? I would buy the cheapest paint they had in the store throw it on the wall and hope for the best.  Point is we know where our individual strengths and weaknesses are and how to work them together.  That is not to say we don’t have our moments, but we work them out and let them go and if the need should ever arise I’ve a pretty nice dog house I can move into.  Of course any relationship is more than the sum of its parts there has to be that thing!

When I was quite young we were driving by a cemetary my mother said, “Look, it is the dead center of town.”  My father replied, “People are just dying to get in there”  I probably won’t live this down as this is the first time I’m going to admit it, but I didn’t get it I figured cemetary’s marked the center of town and they were fenced in to keep all the people out.  eventually I figured it out.

For our honeymoon we went to Vermont.  It just so happens that there are a lot of cemetaries in Vermont.  I decided to see if my wife would take the bait.  We passed a cemetary and I made the comment,  “Oh look a cemetary it’s the dead center of town, people are just dying to get in there.”  There was no response except for The Look.  My wife is smart and she knew me long enough to know something was going on, after all she figured out that a beefmeoak is a porcupine  and ceilingchaos translates to a floor plan not to mention the host of others that I previously thought only my family and possibly Victor Borges could work out on their own and find funny.   Each time we passed a cemetary I said the same line.   It must have been the third or fourth cemetary we passed that my wife shocked me into silence:

Me:  “Look its the dead center of town and people are just dying to get in there.” without pause my wife responded completely dead pan: “I’m betting its the underground economy”

We sat in absolute silence for about 30 seconds before we both broke out in fits of laughter.  But in those 30 seconds a whole new door opened for me, I remember the exact thought that went through my head, It doesn’t have to stop there!  To this day I’m not sure when my wife figured it out but obviously she had been thinking about it for some time.  The very next time we passed a cemetary it started in earnest:

Me: “Look its the dead center of town, people are just dying to get in there”

Wife: “Must be the underground economy”

“Yeah and they listen to that 60’s music after all they are a bunch of dead heads”

“And you have to worry about catching a cold with all the coughin’ (coffin)”

“And the gambling! they really like to roll them bones”

With each cemetary we passed we kept adding more and more lines.  Not long ago we drove to California from Pennsylvania it got to the point where we could hold a 25 minute dialogue going back and forth with the puns.  I believe it was when we finally hit New Mexico where whoever was not driving would pretend to be asleep at the first sign of a cemetary.

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