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Archive for the ‘Lifes Observations’ Category

Crab Apple Tree

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , on May 8, 2011| Leave a Comment »

This picture was taken a few years ago.  It is the crab apple tree in our front yard.  Over the last few years we have not gotten very many blooms. The branches grew out of control, rubbing against each other, rubbing against our roof and the side of the house.  Many were sagging dangerously low.   We also had some type of yew bushes growing around the house that we had become tired of mostly because they were unruly and caught many leaves in the fall.  We decided to yank them out and replace them with a few well behaved burning bushes.   We are getting old, and digging them out was not even in the equation.  We did try and hook them up to the riding mower and simply pull them out.  No go, the bushes were going to simply pull the mower into the earth rather than give up their space.

This winter we met some guys who were starting up a business.  In the winter they clear snow and in the summer they deal with trees and bushes.  During the really bad ice and snow we did have them clear out our driveway.  They did a great job.  As spring rolled around we asked them about removing the yew and triming the crab apple tree.  They agreed the Crab apple needed a desperate trimming.   We were in for a huge suprise when we got home.  After the shock I talked to the tree guy.  He told me that he was just going to trim the tree, but in his trimming he couldn’t find decent healthy wood.  In order to try and save the tree he took some drastic measures and kept going till he found healthy wood. He is pretty sure that next year we should see some improvement.  Amazingly this spring we are getting some blumes:

Crab Apple Tooth Pick

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What I Saw

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , on April 28, 2011| 2 Comments »

 
 
On Tuesdays I usually have to make the half hour trip to Lewistown for my job.  While not far, it is interesting as I have to cross over a place called 7 mountains.  In the fully loaded box truck you find yourself standing on the gas pedal all the way up the mountain and standing on the breaks while finding a new relationship with God all the way down.  In our fully loaded cargo van down isn’t so bad, but I do find myself standing on the gas pedal on the way up.

 Some of the interesting sites I’ve seen while making this trip:

  • Some Amish folk hooking up a horse team to pull some fallen trees of a farmer’s field.
  • An ornate buggy being pulled by a horse
  • Turkey vultures lazily circling overhead
  • Red Tailed Hawks playing in the thermals
  • A ground hog standing on its hind legs beside its ridiculously large hole and an even larger mound of earth
  • An iron horse, (see above)
  • A detour sign.

I’m not overly fond of detours especially since I have found that they make you get off your route but they don’t always give great directions on how to get back on track.   I slowed down and looked for the signs.  I didn’t find one sign that said: “Brian, to get back to work go that-a-way!” not one!  If you read my previous post about Garmi the Garmin you know I don’t have a great sense of direction.  But I’ve traveled this route many times before so I didn’t have Garmi turned on.  Garmi was safe in its case in my backpack on the seat beside me and I am way to lazy to pull over and plug Garmi in.  So I kept going.  I have theory about driving when I am lost.  I go straight.  There are two reasons for this.  1. If I have to backtrack I don’t have to figure out where I turned.  2. If I go straight long enough I will eventually circle the globe and end up back where I started, and with a little luck by that time the detour will no longer be there and I can continue on as normal.

  • A wasp, on the inside of the vehicle!

A few minutes into my journey I realized I was not alone in the van.  Crawling down the inside of my window was a wasp.  I am somewhat of a jumpy kind of fellow.  Even if I know you are about to touch me, I  will flinch when you do.  Spotting the wasp out of the corner of my eye almost caused me to have a heart attack. It could have been worse, it could have been a spider!  Slowly I lowered my window.  If you are my employer I was going 55 mph, for the rest of you I was doing about 63mph.  I gave the wasp a flick and the wind flung him to the passanger side window where he sat pouting.  I closed my window and we sat in silence.  I tried to talk to him, but all he did was pout.  I called him Ant. Being a wasp I am not sure he liked the name Ant, but he didn’t complain.  I looked back over to him but he was gone. 

Crap!

“Ant?”  No response. I wasn’t happy and he could be anywhere, in the back, under the dash, in my hair.  There was just no telling where he had was and we had just met so I couldn’t even guess as to where he would think to hide.  Then I saw him, on my arm just below my shoulder.  I don’t think it was a coincidence that at this same time I almost drove off the road.  But I didn’t, instead Ant and I got into an altercation.  I punched him in the face!  Ant flew back to the passenger side window and went back to pouting.  I felt a little bad about punching him in the face. 

“Hey Ant, you okay buddy?”  He seemed to be, but he was sulking.   I gave him some time alone with his thoughts and he seemed content to stay where he was.

“Listen Ant, we are about to go over Seven Mountains, it is a stressful enough ride when I’m on my own.  All I am asking is that you stay on your side of the van.” No response.  he still seemed to be pouting.  I couldn’t blame him after all I punched him in the face. “I understand you are upset, but look at this way.  At least you are not paying for gas!”  I think that made him to smile, but it was hard to tell. 

We were doing pretty good until I took the exit off the expressway into Lewistown.  Perhaps his bladder realized that we were almost at the end of the ride.  I know my bladder always does.  Anyway, Ant got antsy and starting to fly again.  “Hey Ant, your nose feeling better?  Don’t make me punch you again”  He flew slowly towards me, just kind of hovered over my steering wheel for a moment then back to ther rearview mirror and back to his perch along the passenger side window.  Finally we reached our destination and we both went on our way. 

I wonder, if And were writing this, what did he see?

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Hail of a Ride

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , on April 26, 2011| 2 Comments »

i

I-99 the one up top
I-99 is the one going across the top

T’was an interesting drive home  tonight.  One moment we were enjoying the usual drive over the mountain via route I-99 , the next moment? There it was. The storm only seconds in front of us and it was bad.  There was just enough time for my wife to tell the person she was on the phone with that she had to go as we were heading into a storm.  The next second we were in the thick of it.  I was trying to concentrate on the car ahead of me who never turned his lights on so I was concentrating on his break lights.  I had no idea where we were on the road as I could not see the lines, I couldn’t even see the road.  I did know we were close to one of the hairy overpasses and I seriously didn’t want to go over the edge.  Some smart people had pulled off to the side, hazard lights flashing as were ours.  I was worried about the car behind us if I pulled over would he see?  If I pulled off would I be pulling off into somebody else who didn’t have the hazard lights on?  Yes it was that bad.  My wife suggested I try and keep up with the car ahead of us that way we had something we could see.  As I gently pressed on the gas peddle an 18 wheeler pulled up beside us.  At least we could see that.  In a moment it pulled ahead, the truck could not be going faster than the 15 or 20 mph that we were doing.  Yet like a whale vanishing between the waves it too was gone in seconds.  Again the idea was to keep up with the truck, suddenly there it was still in the passing lane but this time at a dead stop.  A car was pulled off the road at least I thought it was because all I could see were the hazards.  We pulled off right behind it, the car behind us pulled off as well. The truck was idling beside me, traffic all around was now stopped.  In the slight break in the weather, through the mist we spotted another truck this one half on the road, the cab was well into shoulder, my wife started to call 911, we could still barely see and another wave of hail was heading our way.  The truck managed to straighten up.  And then another wave hit, we watched as the hail bounced off the car.  This time traffic stopped all around.  Luck would have it that the storm passed quickly. I was suprised to see we were on the overpass pictured above.  Traffic started moving slowly, drivers and passangers all looking a little dazed, everyone moving with a little more care.  A new river was born as the water flowed down the mountain by way of the median.  As we started moving we saw how bad it could have been.  The truck that was half in the lane had swerved to avoid an accident, just ahead of him there was a minor accident between an suv and another truck.  They were all fine, we were fine.  A little shaken, A little stirred but we survived. 

As we got out of the car we heard the siren bell going off in Port Matilda.  On the weather station not only was there storm warnings there was tornado warning but we didn’t see exactly what area it was for but it couldn’t be far. 

It is good to be home!

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Let My People Go! The Story of Passover

Posted in Being Jewish, Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , , on April 22, 2011| 20 Comments »

Matzo, mmm good! Not!

 
Seeing as my post on Chanukah proved to be so popular I thought it would only be right to try my hand at the story of Passover.

If you don’t know about Passover and went to a Jewish home during the first night of the holiday and rudely arrived really late missing the reading of the haggadah (the story of Exodus as told in the Torah) you may think that Passover is simply short for ‘pass-it-over’ as in: “Hey you, the one closest to the brisket do me a favour and pass it over”

Chances are you will arrive before the reading of the Haggadah in which case you may think Passover is short for ‘pass-this-over’ because after the first two hours of being read to, (usually in Hebrew) you may find yourself thinking: “Can’t we just pass-this-over and get to the food already?

Passover commemorates the story of the Exodus when the ancient Israelites were freed from slavery in Egypt.  Passover begins on the 15th day of the month of Nisan, no silly, not the car, the first month of the ecclesiastical year and the seventh month of the civil year, on the Hebrew calendar.  More simply put, the first month of the festival year.  This holiday, the most celebrated among the Jews lasts for seven days.

The telling of this story is the responsibility of the Jews to pass onto their ‘sons’ “And thou shalt tell thy son in that day, saying: It is because of that which the LORD did for me when I came forth out of Egypt.” Exodus.13.8

The first two and the last two nights are special meals kicked off by the reading of the Haggadah. The meal ceremony starts at sundown and if you are lucky you start to eat around 9pm, during the reading of the haggadah you get to consume four glasses of wine, a crumb of bread, and a few measly bitter herbs that we dunk in salt water to remember the plight of the Jews.  This dunking is so nice, we do it twice!  Okay we do it twice to reinforce the tears shed.  But you also get to do fun stuff during the ceremony like:

 Dipping your finger in the wine 10 times and letting one drop fall to the plate for each of the 10 plagues.  One may think this is alcohol abuse but if you have ever had Manashevitz, (a kosher wine) then you might just agree that it is better on the plate then in your mouth.  

And then there is the fun game of ‘hide the Matzo’.  I have to admit I never knew the significance of the hiding of the matzo.  There are two ways to go about hiding the matzo, in some families the head of the table hides the matzo and the kids look for it at a particular point during the ceremony.  When found the kids get a little cash.  Some do the opposite the kids hide the matzo and get a little cash when the head of the table finds it.  Still makes no sense!  So, just for you my faithful readers I put in the leg work and asked Rabbi Google.  I didn’t like the first response, or the second or even the third.  The more I searched the more pissed I became.  The hiding of the matzo is a scam!  It has no religious significance, it tells no tale, and it represents nothing!  It exists because the evening is so long the powers that be decided to create this little task for the sole purpose of keeping the children awake and attentive during the ceremony!

Other than that you sit breathing in the aroma of wonderful food that sits in the other room waiting, waiting to be eaten as you slowly starve to death.  I think this is done purposely in order to truly understand what it is like to wander through the dessert for 40 years.  

I’m not going to go into all the Passover details, as there is way too much that goes on during the holiday.  But there are some interesting things you may want to know about…or the salient points according to me:

  • God helped the Israelites escape Egypt by inflicting 10 plagues upon the Egyptians before the Pharaoh would release his slaves.  The last one being that the first born son of every Egyptian would be slaughtered.  It could have been avoided if Ramsey had just listened to Moses when he said; “Let my people go” or at least when Charlton Heston said it in the movies.  My other favorite Charlton Heston line is; “Get your hand off me you damned dirty ape!”  But that’s another movie.
  • Speaking of the movie ‘The 10 Commandments’ which theatrically tells the story of the exodus. I think they need to re-make the movie and Angelina Jolie should play the role of Nefertiti. 
  • The Israelites were instructed to mark the doorposts of their homes with the blood of a spring lamb and, upon seeing this, the spirit of the Lord passed over these homes saving them from the 10 plagues, hence the name ‘Passover’.
  • When the Pharaoh finally gave his word, the Israelites left so fast they didn’t even have time to wait for the bread to rise.  This was so traumatic that to this day Jews around the world have to eat Matzo (unleavened bread, see picture above) for seven consecutive days every single year.  Oy!
  • I couldn’t figure out why it took forty years to find the holy land.  Certainly somebody could have stopped and asked for directions even if the men wouldn’t I’m sure a woman would have.   Later I learned that this was a clever plan by God. You see when they reached Mt. Sinai the Jews went a little crazy and started making false idols and made a little party of it, as a punishment God made sure that generation never got to see the Promised Land.
  •  Moses led the Jews through the dessert for 40 years, yet Moses himself was not allowed to enter the holy land.  He wasn’t even allowed to cross the Jordan River!  I thought this highly unfair.  After a lot of time and research I found out that there was a moment when my people were getting really thirsty during the crossing and Moses started to doubt God’s plan and asked God; “Why? Why are you doing this, why am I leading these people through all this only to starve to death?”  God told Moses to tap the rock and in tapping the rock water appeared, but God was pissed at Moses for doubting his word and so Moses was not allowed into the promised land, the lesson here is don’t piss off God.
  • During the Passover ceremony there are four questions that the youngest male at the table is supposed to ask: 1 Why is it that on all other nights we eat both Bread and Matzo, but on this night we eat only Matzo?  2 Why is it that on other nights we eat all kinds of herbs, but on this night we eat only bitter herbs? 3 Why is it that on all other nights we dip our herbs once, but on this night we dip them twice? 4 Why is it that on all other nights we eat either reclining or sitting, but on this night we eat reclining?

You may notice that I have answered all the four questions except for one, the last one.  Could it be that I don’t know the answer?  No people, I have the internet at my disposal I have all the answers.   I didn’t answer the final question because in all my Passover’s past I never got to eat reclining.  I never even thought about it, and now I am feeling a little pissed off so figure it out yourself!  In the meantime grab your favourite pillow, relax and enjoy your freedom. 

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Lessons Learned?

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , on April 18, 2011| 3 Comments »

Doh

Some bits of wisdom I’ve picked up along the way.

1) One of the first times behind the ‘Perfect Magic’ counter at a magic convention I was performing an effect for a customer when two very prominent figures in magic walked up to watch, (Sid Loraine and Frank Garcia).  Suddenly I became a jumble of nerves.  Later Mr. Garcia found me sitting in the lobby and he said to me that I should never be nervous when performing in front of another magician.  “A true magician,” he said,” will always be there to help you. We are after all, a brotherhood.”  I try to remember this bit of wisdom when dealing with people in general.  I’ve got to tell you, I’m not always successful.

2) While I believe it is true that when you fall off a horse you have to get right back on, I am also old enough to realize that some horses are just not meant to be ridden.

3) Yes poop rolls downhill.  But really if you keep your eyes open you can usually step out of its way. Of course there is an equally good chance you are going to get poop in your eye.

4) Stay away from people who say they don’t like ‘drama’ in their lives as they are usually the ones with the most, and create the most drama, and can’t seem to function without it.

5) I’m more of a finesse type person.  I like to approach things slowly and delicately.  However I have learned that there is something to be said about the bull in the china shop approach.

6) I don’t like confrontation.  But you really cannot make a good omelet without breaking those eggs. 

7) The more I look for things to write about, the fewer things I find to write about.

8) Most of the time it is not about blame and it is not always about you.  So when something happens stop trying to come up with excuses as to why it is not your fault.  instead why not try to find resolution for the situation.  

9) There is an incredible amount of value in knowing when to shut your mouth and open your ears.

10) Even though Ghandi said it first, my wife, more that anyone has taught me through her actions, that you really do have to be the change you want to see in the world.

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Stress? Can You Say Stress?

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , on April 11, 2011| 6 Comments »

While still dating my first wife we found ourselves in the car sitting in front of my house, (I was still living at home) when J (for lack of her real name) says to me:

J: “You must be embarrassed by me!” She said this with quite a bit of tone.

Me: “What are you talking about?”

J: “We have been going out for quite some time and you never invite me up to see your parents”

Me: “Well we are here now, let’s go up.”

I think she was expecting an argument because as I got out of the car she just sat there.  So I walked around the car and opened the door for her, she didn’t want to get out of the car.

Me: “So? What is the problem?  You sit there and out of the blue accuse me of being embarrassed of you because you have never met my folks.  You are right, you never met them but not because I am ashamed of you or them or anything. I just never thought about it. 

J: “Perhaps we shouldn’t do this tonight.”

Me: “Nope, you brought it up, now it is sounding like you just wanted to start a fight. I’m going up the stairs, you can follow or not.  Either way this conversation is not happening again.”

What I had forgotten was that it was a Friday night.  At that time we had a Friday night tradition.  Some friends of my parents would come over for a rousing night of Trivial Pursuit.  This particular night there was more than the one other couple.  I had to feel a little bad for J first she wasn’t expecting to meet my parents, she was just looking for a fight, that backfired and now she was meeting her boyfriends folks for the first time and to make it even worse she had to meet them in front of a room full of strangers.  And just to add fuel to the fire it was a room full of magicians.  I know many of you can’t fully understand the significance of a room full of magicians so you will just have to trust me when I tell you that magicians are not like ‘normal’ people. Despite ourselves a good time was had by all.  Even J had to admit it was a fun, different and interesting evening.

In retrospect J had it easy. 

Fast forward many years…

I lived in Vancouver, Denyce my current wife was living here in Central Pa and my folks live in Montreal.  Denyce and I had been having a long distance relationship for quite some time.  We were waiting for the go ahead from INS to allow me to move to the USA.  I was moving here on a Fiancé visa which means once everything is clear and INS says jump you have to move and be married within a very short period of time.  We planned as much as we could in advance but without an actual date there was a lot left in the air.  Our saving grace was we were going to be married and have the reception in our back yard.  Finally after two years of planning, paperwork, checks being written, doctors appointments, background checks, more forms being filled out INS said jump.  With help from my parents we got the loose ends in BC tied up and I started my journey to a new life.

Denyce had never met my parents or any of my family.  They had talked on the phone but never met.  We set our wedding plans in motion, picked the date and sent the official invitations.  Poor Denyce not only did she have the stress of a wedding and being married she was going to get to meet my family for the first time on her wedding day.  Denyce, over the phone expressed to my youngest sister, (Mommy Said What?) how nervous she was about meeting her family-in-laws for the first time at her own wedding.  My sister replied; don’t be silly we will all meet the day before the wedding.

But it gets worse.  Denyce had decided to invite her father to the wedding.  He lives in California and they had been estranged for at least 10yrs.  While she wanted him to show up she really didn’t think he would.  Surprise! He was driving down for the occasion. Denyce was not only meeting her future in-laws she was also meeting her father all on the day before her wedding.

Can you say stress?

I am not just typing all this out for my health, there is a lesson here.  If you ever find yourself in a similar stressful situation I highly suggest having a keg or two of beer waiting for you at the end of the rainbow.  We did and it was wonderful.

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March 31, Still Snowing

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , on March 31, 2011| 4 Comments »

It is the end of March and what we have here is a winter wonderland.  Stepping outside it is like entering a different planet. 

 This one is at the end of the driveway heading into the woods.

 This was taken a few days ago.  On our property there was very little ice except for the very tops of the trees.  This picture is taken of the property across the road and leading up higher onto the mountain.  The white is the ice encrusted branches on the trees.

Another night shot.

Winter Wonder Land.

Snowing through the night.

Two of the possums we released this past summer. Why post them here? Because they are so freaking cute.

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We Are…Penn State!

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , on March 27, 2011| 5 Comments »

Imagine one hundred thousand plus people yelling “We Are Penn State!” at the tops of their collective lungs. Imagine each word being punctuated by the stomping of two hundred thousand feet on the stadium floor! Imagine an additional 60 or 70 thousand tailgaters’ outside the stadium doing the exact same thing. In a word it is, surreal.  In three words it is; Penn State football!

I’ve never been a fan of football I’m not really a sports fan at all.  But here I am in State College home of the Penn State Nittany Lions.  And lets not forget that State College is deeply ensconced in the Steeler Nation!  The only entity more important than football is hunting (something else I don’t partake in) and the two entities run a pretty close race.

To add to the fun, it seems that all the Penn State sports teams are called the Nittany Lions unless they are the Nittany Lady Lions.  Which means you have to know which sports season you are in to know if people are talking about basketball, football, volley ball or wrestling.

Every now and again our marketing manager manages to get extra tickets to sporting events.  To be fair she holds a draw for the extra tickets.  Two years ago I won four tickets to a Penn State game.  My wife who has been here since 1986 had also never been to a game.  We figured what the heck?  The stadium holds over one hundred thousand people and is only used for Penn State football home games which are held roughly six times a year.  The stadium has bench seating and they cram as many people onto those benches as possible.  So we decided to be greedy and hold onto the extra two tickets to give us a little more breathing room butt space. 

Before this tale even begins I’m giving away the ending.  Not only was this my first game, it was also my last.  Yes, I had that much fun.

First was the parking.  We didn’t get to park near the stadium, season ticket holders who pay thousands of dollars don’t get to park next to the stadium.  We didn’t even get to park in the fields across from the stadium (that is where season ticket holders get to park if the ‘donation’ they made to become season ticket holders was large enough) suffice it to say that after the fields there are more fields, to the left of those fields there is a little dirt road. At the end of the dirt road there are more fields, we got to park in those fields. And we had the privilege of paying twenty dollars to park in that field.  Many of the people parked in our field didn’t even go to the game, they were tailgaters.  In our field the tailgaters had lawn chairs and coolers full of beer and the occasional radio.  As we walked the 2 miles to the stadium the class of tailgaters got a little higher.  Some of these tailgaters were parked in campers that were more expensive then our house, they featured outdoor kitchens and 42 inch plasma TV’s which slid out from the side of the RV for outdoor watching.  Some had custom paint jobs in blue and white (Penn State Colour’s) and bumper stickers with witty sayings proving that God loves Penn State, the proof being that God made the sky blue and the clouds white.

Click for pick of Stadium

Finally we made it to the game.  We actually had pretty good seats the problem was getting to them. The two miles to the stadium wasn’t punishment enough, now we had to fight our way up miles of ramps and stairs.  There was a time or two I didn’t think I was going to make it.  I’m not sure how my wife survived.  Our seats were not really seats nor were they benches.  It was more like sitting on a railroad tie only not as comfortable.  The good news is you don’t get to sit on them very often, every time something exciting happened everyone stood up so you couldn’t see anything anyway.  Good thing for us we had the bees keeping us busy so we were not too concerned about what was happening on the field. 

We did have fun shouting, “We Are…Penn State!” We had fun doing the wave, first at normal speed, then at super fast speed, then in slow motion and my wife enjoyed the occasional “Whooo Hooo” She didn’t know what it was all about but every now again, on the big screen the words, “Whoooo Hoooo popped up and everyone yelled them at the same time in perfect karaoke style.    But even that didn’t hold our attention very long.  At half time we called it a day and made the long trek back to the car.

In the end it was a good day.  The Nittany Lions won, we know this because we did watch the last quarter of the game, at home, in the air conditioning, with beer in hand, sitting on our recliners half asleep in front of our 42 inch flat screen TV.  And while we didn’t have the bees to entertain us, the six cats did an excellent job.

In writing this blog I started to wonder how Penn State got its simple slogan.  And simple though it may be, the story is why everyone involved in Penn State should be proud.

Wally Triplett an African-American halfback played for Penn State in the 1940’s when much of varsity football was still segrated.  In 1948, Penn State was invited to play at the Cotton Bowl, and there were rumblings of having meetings to discuss if Penn State should send their African American players to the game. Steve Suhey the team captain put an end to any meetings before they could start. “We are Penn State” he said, “There will be no meetings”. The full team traveled to Texas, and Triplett scored the game tying touchdown.

For those of you locals that read this blog, next time you are at a game, or tailgating or enjoying the game from home and everyone starts screaming WE ARE…PENN STATE!  Remember Wally Triplett and Steve Suhey, stand up stomp your feet and yell at the top of your lungs with all the pride you can muster, because WE ARE!…PENN STATE!

EDIT: After posting this I found this video on youtube.  A two minute ‘documentary‘ on a typical gameday in State College. (note the stairs, those are only some of them).

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Rat Bastards

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , , on March 24, 2011| 3 Comments »

A recent post on Facebook from my friend Penney:

“I would like a few minutes alone with whatever sick freak of a toy manufacturer came up with the idea of noisy toys with no OFF SWITCH! What, did they cut a secret deal with Duracel? I’m so tired of hearing these things go off when I clean the kids’ rooms.”

Seeing that I’m having trouble coming up with things to write about I figured this would make a great theme for a blog post.  What other rat bastard’s are out there?

How about…

The idiot’s who made the decision to keep manufacturing one-ply toilet paper after two-ply hit the market?  Rat Bastard!

The guy who invented the alarm clock?

The guy who came up with perforations on packaging to make it easier to open packages?  For the most part I think the perforations are re-enforced.

The person who came up with the idea of daylight savings?

The guy who came up with that stupid baby on board sign?  Do you honestly believe I am going to change my driving habits because you have a baby on board?  A co-worker once told me that she has one so that other drivers will understand if she suddenly slows down because she has to attend to the baby in the back seat!  Excuse me people but if that is your thinking then might I suggest that having a baby in your car does not entitle you to become a moving hazard.  Pull off the road and deal with the child, or how about this, let the kid cry!  It won’t kill anybody.

Joggers who jog on the street? Do people honestly think that is healthy? Pounding your knees, feet and hips on that pavement?  Breathing in those fresh car fumes? How about the ones who jog in 90 degree heat, or when it is 10 below zero? And a note to those who jog three and four abreast so they are halfway into the road, my car trumps your bones.   

The person who is undoubtedly going to come up with something better than blue-ray? I don’t want to buy a new piece of equipment and I don’t want to buy my movies…again.

Those that win big in the lottery only to end up in debt three years later?  For crying out loud just give me the money.

I’m sure this list will grow as time goes by.  Feel free to add your own in the comment section.

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Fruit Farm

Posted in Lifes Observations, tagged , , , on March 16, 2011| 7 Comments »

Twenty minutes from our home sits Way Fruit Farm which has been owned by the same family for six generations. As the name suggests they grow fruit, but they are so much more. They carry vegetables and meat from local growers and farmers plus ciders and baked goods. They also have a sandwich shop and a gift type store that is always fun to peruse filled with teas, coffees, farmhouse furniture and crafts by local artisans.

In the fall they set up wagon rides for the kids, a trebuchet for the annual pumpkin toss. During the different growing seasons you can either go into the field and for a few cents less a bushel you can pick your own fruit or you can spend the extra few cents and purchase the stuff already picked. Can you guess which I choose?

So why, might you ask, am I sharing all this information with you? I know what you are thinking. An earlier post of mine managed to snag me a free meal at Denny’s because of the wonderful stuff I said about them, and perhaps now I am going to try for free fruit. While that would be nice and we really do like Way Fruit Farm this post is about to take a turn for the worse.

The good folks at the Farm happen to have a Facebook page. Who doesn’t? The other day I came across the following post from our friendly farmers:

Way Fruit Farm: “Apple Tree trimming Demo: Sat., March 26, 10:30am. Free! Bring your own hand trimmers to practice on our trees. Meet in lobby @ farm store and head to orchard across the road. Dress for cold & mud as both are a possibility. Bring anyone else not interested in trimming too! Our café is open for breakfast & lunch. Browse craft & home decor area, newly decorated for spring! Kids enjoy “Corn Bin” play area.”

Now you may be thinking, ‘that sounds like it could be fun’ and you may be right. I, however am a little more cynical I didn’t read fun into the above post, here is what I imagine went down in the Way household the other morning:

Way Fruit Farm Employee:

“Man! Time to prune and trim up those cursed apple trees, wouldn’t be bad if there were just a handful but there are so many. Up at the crack of dawn and not coming in from the fields till it is too dark to see, it is going to take weeks to prune the blasted trees.’

Reluctantly the faithful employee bends down to put on his old boots, he sighs as he pulls tightly on the laces and then it strikes him, strikes him like a bolt of lightning.

‘I know, we can teach other people how to trim apple trees, not only that we can have them bring their own equipment, not only that we can have them practice trim our trees cutting the time it usually would take in half.’

He grins to himself and knows his employers the Way’s will simply love the idea. Perhaps, he thinks to himself, it is going to be a great day after all. Then another though strikes him. This thought strikes him so hard he has to sit and laugh.

‘And then when it is time for the harvest, we can let them pick their own apples and charge them for the pleasure!”

As my friend Murray Sawchuck likes to say, “livin’ the dream…livin’ the dream.

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